I’ve scheduled my Rituxen sessions

These will be for the next four weeks, starting this coming Tuesday.  At first I admit that I had some (ok, a lot of) trepidation.  I was kind of negative about the process, and full of fear. “Great, I’m pumping poison into my system that will reduce my immunity,” I thought.  “I bet I’ll catch an infection and be sick forever.”  I expressed this to a pal of mine, and she had this to say:

Maybe try to imagine your body as a relatively simple (but extraordinary) machine… your digestive tract as a semi-sealed system. The cancer is a rust that is compromising your system, trying to perforate an evacuation duct. Chemo is a treatment that will arrest the rust, and send it out of your system. Your body will seal up the duct, and you’ll be an extraordinary machine once again.

And for christ’s sake, keep your energy and optimism up. Even if it’s faked at first. Don’t succumb to the treatment. Join forces with it and fight the rust.

Thank you, Kate, for saying what I needed to hear!

I’ll be working on a visualization to do while I get my Rituxen drip (about a six hour process every Tuesday).  It’ll be about herding the Rituxen right toward the cancer and away from the happy B-cells that deal with immunity.

Ah, and someone recommended that I crochet again.  Specifically ewoks.  Good suggestion for using up my IV drip time!

So what’s that picture about, above?  😀 I bet some of you already know…

Leave a comment


  1. “Fear is the mind-killer. I will not fear…”

    The story “Carcinoma Angels” by Norman Spinrad might give you some ideas for visualizations —

  2. Awesome visual metaphor. I like the crochet idea … and you’ve picked out some good music to listen to, I’m guessing … we’ll be thinking good navigation thoughts on Tuesday for you.


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